"Berjuang"

1 Korintus 2:9

Itu ayat saya untuk tahun ini... "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived, what God has prepared for those who love Him."

Saya begitu bahagia waktu tanggal 1 januari 2013 saya menerima ayat itu. Berbeda dengan tahun 2012 waktu saya menerima ayat tentang 'ketaatan', kali ini saya merasakan sukacita yang luar biasa. Saya merasa bahwa tahun ini akan penuh dengan mujizat, penuh dengan berkat, bebas dari beban berat yang melingkupi kehidupan saya di tahun 2012. Saya percaya bgt tahun ini bakal "REAP THE HARVEST" tahun dimana Tuhan akan memberkati saya NONSTOP. But, well... It might be true? Kalo saya cuman menangkap kata-kata pertama di ayat ini dan melupakan kalimat "...untuk mereka yang mengasihi Dia."(For those who love Him)It would be great senang menyenangkan enjoy asik oke oke aja. Tapi kalau saya take into account kalimat terakhir which is for those who love Him, it would be something 'different'.

What do you mean by loving God? Is it easy...? Ha. Nope! Cinta... Kita bilang kita cinta sama Tuhan.... gampang kalo ngomong doang! Tapi cinta itu terkadang involves Sacrifice, your time, your money, your OBEDIENCE. Cinta butuh perjuangan. Dan Tuhan mau lihat itu... Tuhan bakal "tests" you how much do you love Him? He wants to know what you made of! He wants to see how deep is your love to Him... Because He wants you! He wants you as a whole! And His passion is to have deeper relationship with you...  Deeper.. deeper everyday, because He loves you so much! 

Jadi kalau mau lihat apa yang "Tidak pernah dilihat mata"... "tidak pernah didengar telinga" tidak pernah... "timbul di dalam hati manusia" you gotta show Him that you love Him. If you do it, be ready to reap what you sow... Menuai apa yang kita tabur, sometimes it will be greater! Greater blessings... more than what u could imagine.

And to love Him means... to love Him dengan segenap hatimu, jiwamu, dan dengan segenap akal budimu. Berarti tidak "terbagi", dan itu susah! Butuh perjuangan. Karena hidup kita ga akan lepas dari masalah dan pencobaan. Well, sama seperti kesetiaan.. Kita perlu berjuang, have a "heart check" everyday, being discipline, push ourself a little bit harder.. sampe sama kayak lagu yg bilang, "Dan Kau kan temukan, pada akhirnya ku tetap setia.."

So its not an easy "verse" for me this year. Theres still something God wants me to learn. And there are more "levels" in front of me that God wants to bring me into... Ibarat game, level yg harus ditaklukan masih banyak. Levels of kesetiaan, ketaatan, dan iman. To be the "me" that God intended me to be. And I want to welcome it with smile and gratefulness!

"How I long to be deeper in LOVE ..."

 

 “If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery--isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you'll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you're going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It's the only good fight there is.”
― Charles Bukowski, Factotum